2017-11-07

Yawn 32

Sep 23 - Nov 7

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Ten years of iPhone and we still get crippleware that can't perform as a touch-screen laptop with cellular calls.

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I just realised that a large fraction of recent investments in Malaysian co-working spaces are hot money from VCs and listed growth companies. Whereas it makes my job harder, I am very slightly amused by the proposition that in the decade-long war of attrition to capture nomadic workers... there is a miniscule chance that my little project here might outlast some of these big fish. We tend to spend our free time punting on which cafe is going to close next... hehehe. Us? Meanwhile we run the premiere independent brand for this market, with a unique revenue strategy, albeit an inability to scale without further investment. Two years on and still asking for that 1 MM USD round... where is my hot moneh?

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R&R kinda day. Chatted with folks. Wrote an essay. Walked in a mall. Studied Chinese. Listened to piano for hours (haven't messed with one in years). Ensured bedrest. Not healing as fast as I would like, but healing perhaps faster than usual. On with it.

Thinking about a couple of technical points on recuperation: (1) Does constant exposure to arpeggiated minor key melodies interact with the part of my auditory cortex that lifts emotional semantics from listened conversations? It feels that way. (2) Oxytocin exposure is supposed to amplify ingroup reinforcement. Generally, I treat all business relations and playmates as outgroup entities, with a subset of these as ingroup entities. Of late, diverse exposure to playmates has raised the rate of context-switching, and may have inadvertantly loosened the filters I usually enforce on ingroup admission: too many ingroup entities results in distorted priorities.

Fixing...

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On the commerce of sex, surely someone has raised this point before:

So in a society where men respect a [the property rights of [the partner of [a woman]]] more than [the preferences of [the woman herself]], it has come to pass that when a woman wants to avoid a man's sexual advances, she may say, "I have a boyfriend / husband," instead of "I don't want to talk to you." (There is a case to be made that this works instead because the man cares about the woman's loneliness... or cares about something else entirely.)

However, this may not convey the right message in a society where the predicate, "has a male partner," does not imply, "is sexually unavailable," "is unwilling to negotiate her sexual availability," or "is already relationally fulfilled." In fact typically the first questions that comes to mind, which I typically have to censor myself from asking, are:

- "And are you happy with him?"
- "Sweet. Where do I apply?"
- "And how many partners do you have?"
- "Will he be seeing you today?"

... hrm. Maybe I'm up too late, and imagining things I shouldn't really concern myself with.

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My risk appetite will be the death of me. Maybe 2% of me. Oh wait, that was already the finger that got amputated. Shit, next time it's going to be the gonads. Fear, fear, fear.

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#counsellingtoday
"I don't sit down and chill with the girls, joke around or booze up together. That doesn't means that I am unfriendly or stuck up. Why don't they like me?"
"Oh, so here's the news. Needy people are needy. If you want them to like you, you have to treat them like customers."
"Are you being sarcastic?"
"Fact of nature. If you aren't aware of this, perhaps spend more time observing the common human. You don't have to envy, respect, or even like them... but in order to get them to like you, you have to press their buttons. QED"

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Today's inflammatory posting on the commerce of sex, would be that Twitter thread on the undo-ability of consent. But y'all can just head to Twitter now, as the debate is old, and so full of leaky abstractions that I'm not consenting to get out of bed without money to curate that discussion, though I am likely to regret my non-consent and attempt to undo it at a near future point in time. Contracts, people, this is why we need written contracts. Tis then the season for the perusal of a smart-contracts sexual consent protocol/app... who has done this?

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Just wait, some company like SNAP is going to provide smart contracts alla The Homerun Protocol, and change sexting forever. Maybe finally we'll raise a generation on Earth that appreciates formal process, because formal process became easy to implement on a global scale and at low cost to the individual.

Jumping two steps ahead, you're then going to see kids who are great at getting around in society who have really bad practice at reading non-verbal cues. Cue rising rates of autism spectrum behaviour (and I mean, resulting from both changing cultures, and changing gene pools) in more quantified economies...

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Work. Neverending.

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Against the mountain of chores again. Let's begin with rituals:
- I am appreciative of good fortune, to have privilege in political-economy, in class of mind and body, with associates and neighbours of value to my person.
- Force-feeding time!
- Soon, to chores. Maybe social life later, if I can afford it.

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On picking a major based on what job you want:
(Some say this doesn't really apply to liberal arts programs. This is correct for a subset of students, and that subset of students is simply not the target readership of the CNA commentary.)

Regarding some comments in the thread, I would defend the position that liberal arts students need to begin with the end in mind. This is because the choice to postpone/forego specialised knowledge in certain dimensions should be administered in the context of commerce, which was the initial motivation for the Liberal Arts program: to secure economic inequality between powerful and weak members of society, using a moat of knowledge.

When I attended a liberal arts college, most professors were hired AS SPECIALISTS, and did not have a structural appreciation of the comparative advantage of non-specialisation. Most were unfamiliar with the classical definition of Liberal Arts, and with the 20th century definition of Liberal Education, and how these are two different programs with different objectives. I ended up spending 20-30% of my undergraduate time figuring this was a problem, then spending another 40-50% of my time fixing it for myself... without involvement from the institution, because the institution wasn't interested in the problem sufficiently to support my approach to fixing it for myself. :P In order to have the time to do this, I had to pick the major with the lowest homework requirement, which gave me more free time for independent work, and so I now have a BA in Philosophy. ;P

Moreover I think the article is correct because if facilitation had been available, I should have been able to obtain a facilitated version of my independent studies at 40% of the time it cost for me to build it myself. Then with the other 60%, I should have been able to also accomplish technical specialisations which I didn't have time to do due to the generalisation being the higher priority. Finally, this entire approach needs to be rationalised at the pre-application process for students... because the notion that you go to to school to wonder about things aimlessly is not a rational use of funds. (I only could afford it because someone else paid for it, almost entirely.) The liberal arts curricula could be mostly improved in most schools that claim to execute it. I think most of the curricula are really bad at this.

But I am not a professional, so I can only offer the perspective of a former student. :P

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Now now, children, just remember that everything you say in private might as well be public, just as it has been since the wireless microphone was invented a hundred years ago.

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On Malaysians spoiling their votes:
#teamapathy #watchthenationburn :D (Actually I just don't accept that Malaysia is a functioning democracy: I will accept evidence that it is after the first time BN loses its role as Government. But until then, I am not doing anything about it. And while I would not place certainty on BN ever losing, I am constantly reminded that many people feel more strongly about saving the country from BN than I do. I am proud of them, and I think we have different priorities with our time. From time to time, do like to quote Magneto on the pawns going first - and often I am not sure if I should mean it literally or not. But I say it anyway because it accurately describes the idea that the first waves of effort will die, resources spoilt, etc. Ganbate y'all, I believe in you, even if I don't believe in your chances of success. :))

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I was driving back from a social event, and thinking about upcoming meetings with people who have asked me before about our business direction. I have provided many potential directions, but highlighted that the current direction is to work on survival for the one outlet that we operate.
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Sometimes I get asked about my background, but usually people want to know about the subset of my background which relates to F&B. My background in F&B is in night clubs. The champagne, lipstick, pick-ups, and house music variety. My main takeaway from three months in that sort of firm, was that there's a great under-served market for Halal bars in this country. As above, but lose the booze. We could move further to the broader goal of fixing the gap left by the Rukun Tetangga project when it failed to extend past the pre-Internet era, but that would be getting ahead of ourselves. I'm still curious to know who will fill the Halal bar space across the country. Of course, it will simply fill itself up over time.

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Tired. I have a mountain of socks on my bed. And a giant rate card to write...

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When I was in primary school, remembering the times tables up to 12x12 was cool. In college, being able to recite the entire script of Closer after seeing the film once, was cool. As a young business consultant, being able to write meeting minutes entirely from memory was cool.
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Now I can't do any of that. I use a calculator, Google, and mis-spelt sentences in a Whatsapp group with my client for all the above. But this is on a day when I can pretty much assemble and disassemble the accounts, construction materials, CAD planning and design, visual branding, menu design and instruction, supply chain, and about 70% of the compliance requirements for a restaurant in Malaysia. It goes to show that neuroplasticity is well and good, but not always for the better. LOL.

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Looking to buy a 2-group USED machine, for a friend. Manual operations preferred. Please state if original vendor is willing to continue servicing the machine for a new owner.

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Tired. Dinner.

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Hammered out some urgent comms. But now I am awake, and I would like more sleep, but it would probably be prudent to postpone that.

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Had breakfast, an ordinary affair. Thought about work, of course, as that's my main priority in life. Thought about some of the people I meet over work. I suppose, I curate a personality of being a chap that knows the price of everything and the value of nothing. The same way some people curate their skin tones - it is fun, and socially functional to express/reify one's ideas in various media. That is our eternal calling, to play different roles to different people. Agency is so boring, until it tries to play.

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Why do all the women in my life insist on being so gallant? Y'all need to stop guessing my welfare optimisation, and just put your preferred optimisations for your welfare on the table. They'll insist on being gallant anyway. I'm calling toxic feminity... #ironicpostfortheday #commerceofsex #xism

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We recently cooked-up a consulting and outsourcing services rate card, and shared it to the local barista community for reference. You can find it here. If you don't want to join the group, PM, and I'll send you a separate copy. :)

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New project ice boxed. This means less to think about. Clearing caches, and going back to sleep. Phew.

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Is there a spike in the suicide rate after National Suicide Prevention Awareness Month? I guess not.

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Air pollution alarms: I want two of these, one at the smoking area, and one inside the shop. Lol

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6pm. Enforced upgetting. And jogging. Not the best life, but one tries to make it better. :)

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Stop being afraid of sex robots. It's inevitable. It's eventually going to be pretty common for human partners to be simultaneously dependent on separate robots for sex while curating the non-sexual elements of a relationship between the human pair. #commerceofsex

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Test your subconscious evaluation of labels with this industry-grade tool! #commerceofsex — feeling amused.

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"Exciting changes at the cafe?"
"Exciting for observers: great. From my point of view, nothing very new in two years. I like boring. Boring is good. I am going to hang out with my friends tonight."
#headdown #disappear
Edit

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Guys, guys, guys. I think everyone on the planet must be more attached to this cafe than I am. I only own 10% of this. My key role is to make it work. And if caring about things was a prerequisite for doing them, I would not have invented a job where I own only 10% and do most of the work. Please-es, which planet do you come from? This is a business, not a passion project. If I wanted to pursue my "passion," I would have just worked for someone else and did math in my spare time. We are are here to do work... for work's sake... that is business. I really hate repeating myself on this point to passion-driven people. I wish they would all die, suddenly: and the world would be prettier without them. Haha. Ok, up, up, time to do work...

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Lower absolute wealth, or lower inequality? The typical approach of humanists is to argue for a world where there is the highest [lowest standard of living] - so really where you draw the line is which bottom chunk of the population to write off... the bottom 50%? the bottom 5%? The bottom 0.5%? The bottom 0.05% [500k per billion]? Lower? Whose feelings would you really like to hurt? :D

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"My tastes are very... singular."
"Your grammar is... atrocious."
#uhoh

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Ok. November is cash flow demanding for the firm, so I shall have in mind to defer personal payment until we cross the hurdle, so personal expenditure shall also need to be reigned in for October. Whereas, personal metabolic rate is down, probably due to conservation of energy away from body building, but we'll need to bump up that allocation to squeeze RO-cash to its maximum, so making a point to schedule in more physically demanding activities, with the main goal of raising metabolic rate to speed up healing and the removal of sleep debt. In the absence of cheap food supplements, back to being more careful with daily food purchases also. Life is complicated... or boring, but sometimes it is both.

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On encouraging staff to learn fast and move on: It actually works pretty well. We can toss up consulting projects and accidentally have them caught by ex-staff. Lol. And it's not about millennials, really, it's as old as McKinsey - up or out, build a network. As old as kingdoms come and gone.

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I think F&B is boring, but I sure hope our process controls are better than this. (They are probably not, but our mistakes are probably cheaper to fix.)

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Time for enforced exercise, and food.

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Facilitating a large group discussion, over two years, with different reading and comprehension levels, on a subject which is a theoretical construct to most participants, has been a truly mind boggling experience.
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I suppose most of my tenseness comes from watching the group pass a loaded arsenal around, discussing how it works, neither being sure of how to use it, nor having tested it systematically to find out.
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Writing this down just so I reify my understanding of how, and why I feel stressed about this aspect of work.
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The effective way to get this done is with a lot of servicing: individual phone calls, facilitated focus groups, certainly how I got it working in the first place. Sadly, past the first sixty days of the project, the time allocated for that had dropped to a tenth, and past the first twelve months, by another factor of ten. No wonder, my wards feel abandoned. And I feel sadly, unable to attend to them, as triage does not prioritise theoreticians much at all. I don't yet find it a waste, but we have yet to see a happy ending arise for all.

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Well, that was a prior stage of life, and I wasn't too impressed by the USA even in a fratless college, due to the quality and quantity of drunks still staggering around. Most of them are probably wealthier than I am now, if they weren't 16 years ago. :)

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On the human world being a civilisation, and some people who bemoan that possibility. This guy actually feels magic in life, and is depressed by the notion of a simulation. I think that perspective is common. The more parsimonious view is simply that of Cypher, you cannot tell the difference unless you have ever been out.

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Teaching service staff not to get emotionally invested in customers is hard. I told a trainee today, "remember that your personal time will always have more valuable uses than long arguments about ethics with stonewalling counterparties." It is much simpler, and cost-effective, to cut people off, once they are not complying with governance. (If you are a waiter in a restaurant, you are an agent of the restaurant's government.) Simply inform non-compliant folks of their errors, and if they do not comply, request a written notice from your boss, informing the individual that he/she is no longer welcome at the establishment.
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- Interfacing with hissy fits: waste of time.
- Worrying that they will slander you and the establishment: waste of time, if you have a long established case history.
- Low ratings on social media: waste of time.
- Caring about their feelings: waste of time. [Please don't even bother doing this with any individual customer whomsoever, it is more likely to distract you from remote judgements which you should be making every minute, about the state of the room as a whole.]
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Simply remind the angry party to smile, and casually remind them that the business relationship is no longer viable.

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I'm quite certain I don't enjoy leadership roles, but guess what... I often can't find leaders I think are worth following, so I have to lead or just do nothing. lol

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Why are you smiling at me?

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Sometimes it takes a bit longer than an afternoon walk and a cup of coffee to reboot.

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Future dating apps will ENFORCE a protocol of dating, and then based on what protocol you like, you pick your app. #commerceofsex

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"Hire someone who's worked, running the front for an existing cafe - you'll get implicit bias, in preference of style and stuff- which is ok if you're willing to lock yourself in. I tend to think of CX from a very macro segmentation point of view. For example, Sudo Brew's CX is designed to fit a very specific need which I thought was underserved. It's almost anti-Instagrammable, because it's not been the marketing focus. But for a portfolio play, we need to map out the different earnings, lifestyle, and usage pattern categories... and specifically prioritise the segments per cafe.

So Cafe 1: priority is to serve markets ABC in that order

Cafe 2: priority is HGD in that order

Cafe 3: priority isi to AHC in that order

etc.

And that, sets direction for CX, and therefore all decisions on ops on a per outlet basis. I think you can understand my thought process. I remain curious to see yours."

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"There are various "avant garde" / "non sbux" service workflows to be discussed.
Island seating around bar. Zero-seating bars. Self-service. Vending machine, etc. All good and fun."

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Bladerunner 2049 is like Star Wars VII - a crisp echo, but little more than an echo. :)

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Where is my series A? 😛

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Carbo-loading again... fueling up.

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On traffic. Where are my gantries? Tax the shit out of it already.

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Current to-do list:
- pursue more bids for food produced by cafe
- pursue more bids for cafe
- pursue more bids for apartment, to provide cash for cafe
#sellsellsell

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Some people like to feed their dreams, to keep, to cast, and chase them. I tend to feel that dreams are like weeds, and annihilation keeps things tidy. Many people will never enjoy the privilege of choosing between dreaming, and not dreaming. You are the dreamers. We are the cleaners.

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Johor royalty wading in against the conservatives: in case you're wondering, the correct solution is for the Sultan to fund theological think tanks or state agencies to propagate his views. #businessinmalaysia

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What the fuck is "fine casual dining," do you asshats even English?

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Scientists report that genetically, durian is chocolate, squared. #waitsforhipstermarkettoexplode #someonegobuydurianstocks

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M&As. Because the only coffee shop worth operating is legion. :P

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Wash. Breakfast. Deliver coffee. Change Daiso purchases. Buy bulb. Buy electrical parts. Wash. Visit roastery. Camp with desk work. Review. Return. Rest. / For now, enforced activity, that means, less rest, less creativity, and less sanity.

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The mode humam being goes about life looking for reasonable explanation. But not everyone lives with a specific reason for doing so. Looking for a motive? Maybe he was just bored.

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I figure we need to run through 20-30 execs and 50-100 baristas before we cultivate the talent that I require. If the funnel moves slowly, we'll never get there. If you're rich you can buy anyone. If you're not, you have to build them yourself.

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Given that I generally have little in common with my dates, I'm going to start taking OOTDs whenever they do. Get ready for lot of tshirts and denim.

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#MeToo. Though the kids who were trying to touch my chest probably thought I was a girl under that umbrella. #fomo

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"I don't like royalty, but I like this sultan's stance on Islam."
"The enemy of your enemy is..."
"What if the enemy of my enemy is also my enemy?"
"Then you're a shitty politician."

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Use gender neutral slurs, you fuckin snowflakes.

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Dating a foodie who doesn't eat by numbers. We have no future. Lol

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What Zuck always says about Facebook: This is idiotic, simply because Zuck's ideals of human relationships are not universal in nature. Many of us don't care about our friends, we mainly engage with people for commercial gain, and we display falsely intimate information simply to game the substrate that is a society where a large (but less than unit) fraction of people have predictable responses to receiving information that may be deemed intimate.

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Scheduling in about six hours of work with no room for reflection. Enforced feeding and caffeine. Drugs on. Supplier of services not open for business. Procurement for self-service. Automobile user interface repair regression; quick fix unavailable; tidying parts for future fixes. Catching up on talent management chores - a large chunk of my analysis is of the complexity on the order of marking homework for school children; another chunk is on the order of scheduling meetings for other people; aside from that, I must tend to repairs and I do not feel this is a productive use of time. But it is the nature of work, whether it is productive, or not.

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"Men do not talk to one another about nurturance skills: doing so feels too intimate," - this is not exactly true. I regularly discuss it in using the language of "babysitting," with regards to discussions on talent management, CX, and CRM at my office.

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3pm
Up.

4pm
Admin issues via phone. Breakfast is purchased.

5pm
Customers arrive early; service begins. Electrical failure - resolved; work order placed with corporate services.

6pm
Official hours begin. Entertainment of people that one can read, whom one may never care for, proceeds in earnest.

8.5pm
A lull in activity. Breakfast is eaten.

9pm
Bar service; while discussing accounting, IT, project management, and marketing with colleagues, over Slack; entertainment of people one has never met before, whom one may never meet again, continues, with care.

12am
Instawhoring.

1am
Missing cash. Cleaning begins. Multiple Slack conversations in limbo. A piece of cake - freely given, and consumed.

Training of staff proceeds, as it is a quiet day.

Looking forward to:

2.5am
GTFO. Drive staff home. Find lunch. Get more sleep. Procrastinate on administrative issues.

:)

Such is the game.

PS. Made it to bed before 5am. "Achievement unlocked," as the gamers say.


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Clean up. Do work.

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Multiple regressions.

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On "the things men do which make them part of the problem." (The list was too inclusive.)

As unfortunate as it may be, the article is wrong. There are, in language,
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(a) "normative/imperative/prescriptive," statements, which are like orders, didactic inflection, ethical propositions, etc., generally involving the style, "do X," or "you should do X," and there are
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(b) "descriptive," statements, which are of the form: "X is a state of affairs."
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Now you can take sentences such as, "if you wear mini skirts in public, among uncultured men, you will be touched against your will," and they can be interpreted as being of either (a) or (b) forms above, depending on the sophistication of the conversants, and the conversational pusuit.
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Unfortunately, far too often, what is written as (b) gets read as (a), and a petty tiff results..
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As for the people who deal with language at this level, the real problem is that many people are too loose with their attachment of emotions to language.
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So at least we agree partially on the subset of our views that the root substrate of evil, is the abuse of communicative media.

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To discourage dawdling, leave phone on desk when going for lunch. Right?

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I am not sure what is more mind boggling to certain people: (a) that one can view humans as boring, and all human relationships as trivial (b) that one can be married to a job or project, having assigned to it more value than other uses of one's lifespan by virtue of contract, and nothing but contract.

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Still cleaning up messes that occurred a week ago during vaca. LOL.

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On phobias of social conversation: I'm actually not sure if they don't like talking in general, if they don't like dealing with strange people, if they don't like talking about themselves, or if they are just confused, sometimes.

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Laws against discrimination: This is daft. Racism is inherent in the Malaysian constitution. Ask him to go back to China if he doesn't like it here. LOL

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I have to hand it to 3M's marketing segmentation team/agency. They have this surgical tape called Blenderm that's designed for sealing liquids out of dressings, and it's rather strong. It's sold online as "hinging tape for remote control airplanes," and in pharmacies as "double eyelid / eyelash extension attachment tape."

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Self-service kiosks at McDonalds. This is the future we are building for. I always remind staff that their ops roles are temporary, and their only long-term value is in curating CX and supply chains.

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Cafe owner: "My shop is like a lambo, I don't let just anyone drive it."
Me: "Cool bro. My shop is supposed to be a pick-up truck. Call for towing, ah?"

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Caught up on sleep.

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"OK you have enough damage on Instagram. My turn now. :D"
"Try to be messier please. Branding lari nanti. LOL. Also, if we get a new CMO and I buang responsibility for brand, you'll probably have a better time at work.Ensure the key messaging is on "work" and you should be ok."
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What that means is...
[photo] "See coffee," -> [caption] "we're not thinking about the coffee, we're thinking about work."

[photo]"See food," -> [caption] "we're not thinking about the food, we're thinking about work."

to balance it up, you can

[photo] "See work," -> [caption] "by the way, if we have to stop to eat, it's right here, right now, can be swallowed without hurling, decent pricing."

[photo] "See cat / boy / girl / lala / uncle," -> [caption] "something something work, busy, shitting pants, kancheong, productivity"

OK? :P

As per the latest post: among all the cars on the road, the band is a Hilux, not a Camry, not a Prius, or a Lotus, or a VW Camper. LOL"

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On how founders "battle loneliness and anxiety." Well I'll be the first to say it. Unlike the author, I have less than overwhelming concerns for my staff, and near zero concerns for my biological family (some of whom I do hold shares for in my business). So any shortage of social interaction is mostly dealt with discussing as much of my business's operating activities with my network on social media. And any other personal concerns are lobbed into my private philandering practice. Sorry, if it sounds crass, but lifestyle decisions, you know. One does what it takes to balance a portfolio, I suppose.

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On startups with too much money. True of the cafe. But the risk was taken with knowledge of probable outcomes, so does that make me reckless? Probably. I've done it with my own resources before, and now simply on a larger scale with the resources of others. Is it irresponsible if I consider it progress? Probably until we're out of purgatory, yes, I suppose.

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Our brand does not condone the illusion of meaningfulness in work.

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Distractions form a simple life.

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Post birthday bonding rituals:
- check on business banking
- clean sewer
- design new discount cards
- check if anything else has fallen over
- claims
- alipay, mcash, ubereats, tngo pay, octopus card
- first, breakfast

... deploy...

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May we see an eventual end to irrational romances. #commerceofsex

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Mission vs purpose. (HBR article.) In the language of this article, our purpose is the same as WeWork - our strategy is completely different. The first part might be a small lie.

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Feels like a wasted day. But we'll figure out how to optimise around that.

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Overall, a good day, lots of stressors, but all positive.
- woke from a day of catching up on sleep
- social outing with an infrequent partner
- banking for supply chain
- rebooted monthly social media ad campaigns
- knocked in daily social media postings
- curated soap stock
- curated coffee stock
- cleaned an air conditioner
- cleaned a grinder (discovered a flaw)
- helped FOH with dishes and furniture
- purchased sundries
- cancelled birthday dinner with parents because I care about neither bs nor ps relative to other items
- curated wildlife
- curated IT
- dimsum!
- assisted bookeepers
- got a haircut
- replied to an email complaining that our coffee is shit (stakeholder did not mention it in two years?)
- trying to see if I can slot in an IR meeting before bed

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There are two frequent problems with the world. First people are not sure of what they are, and second they are not willing to be honest about it. Then if you fix the first two, you have to watch the horror in the eyes of others. So yes, boring, natural, ancient, problems. Day in, day out.

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Manually migrated 390 customer records from a mañually maintained table to manually maintained table. The data isn't even great. But it is the best we can do for now. It's gonna be a slow week. Up next:
- recruitment ads
- covering shifts
- monthly financial reporting
- possibly retail design if i can fit it in
- fifty slide brand manual if i get asked for it

Hello. I'm Creepy.

Sensitive topic: sexual harassment (or just being socially offensive). If I'm accused of it, I like to take into consideration the point of view of the accuser, so that I can understand why I'm guilty of it from their point of view. I don't think it's reasonable to deny guilt of specific actions - but I do think it's reasonable to claim ignorance of how the other party feels. OK, done with mansplaining that "I can't care about what I'm not told about, and if I caused someone to feel afraid, I suppose it's my fault that they don't want to explain things to me." Here's what happened...
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Ms. X: Hey Jerng, Y says that Z told Y, that Z's female friends A and B don't go to your cafe anymore because the boss was creeping on them.
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Jerng: Sucks to be me. I wonder which ones those might be.
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[Starts going through a mental list of CRM concerns ranging across women whose names I know, those whose names I don't know, those I didn't find attractive, those I did find attractive, those I spoke to, those who spoke back, those who had extended conversations with me, those who expressed no conversational interest, those I'd independently met on Tinder, those I offered my number to, those who suddenly stopped coming to the cafe, those who I interact with on social media, those who do not interact on social media, those I had coffee with at locations other than the office, those I met at the cafe, those I met elsewhere, those I hit on, those who hit on me, and all the intersections of the sets above... brief panic attack.]
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X: More sad that you’re losing business than women.
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Jerng: If you think it's possible, please convey to Y, to X, to victims of of creeping that I would prefer to be told directly what they prefer, so that I can avoid doing it. With apologies.
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X: I don’t know who A and B are. But well, meh. Well, I can tell Y. Will see if Y remembers to pass the message. Also, while you prefer to be told directly, most people don’t because of reasons a b c d e whatever.
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Jerng: Yes, so generally I prefer not to meet women at the office. I do not want to know your name, so that I won't remember you, and so that I can treat you like an arbitrary customer. Will write Facebook post.
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X: I shall look forward to Facebook post. 😂
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[Full disclosure on process, I am checking in on hub-individuals in my network who may have introduced me to other individuals at the cafe, and I am asking for their views on this issue. I am linking this account to the questions. Also, I don't mind being creepy. Just wanna make sure I am not illegally creepy. ]

2017-10-19

A brief review of society and its discontents

- Not all wish for justice.
- Not all wish for peace.
- Not all want you as their friend.
- Not all see more than meat in others.
- Not all abusers have had the privilege of other education.
- Not all citizens respect speech.
- Not all wars can be won with words, or votes, or pacifism.
- Not one of the living will see an end to war.