As usual, I go into most interviews trying to find reason NOT to do the deal - because there are just too many deals to deal with, and some culling is ever in order.
Top four red flags that are "probably," going to give you a good reason not to date me.
- lack of "Asian filial piety"
- you probably will hate me if you don't like being analysed
- I'm potentially never going to make money; I'm open to just never being interested in earning serious money; so it may happen
- related to 3: approach to life and death... because I don't mind dying, the lack of an emergency cash buffer is rarely an issue; because death is the escape hatch; and since I care less than many people about the consequences of emergencies ... a warning is due
This post was a follow-up to this one.
Update (re-told as a set of "standards") 2013-07-15:Update 2013-07-21: Mistake: is is irresponsible of me to drag into relationships... folks with normal fears of labour, poverty, solitude, and fear itself."I had coffee with a philosopher; we talked about love. He said my standards are too high for the KL market. Please. That can't be right."So folks asked what my standards were:"Here's my deck these days (have so much free time, I actually have a bit of work put into this):
1. Specific to the Asian market, you need to be ok with the fact that "filial piety" isn't implemented in my head. I don't treat family much different from non-family unless I actually like you.
2. In general, the following is true. You have to feel no annoyance at being analysed. Analysis is what I do, so it'll happen at some point to everything in my environment. If you're the sort of person who takes personal offense, or religious offense, to the notion that everything can be flowcharted, we are probably heading down a path to trouble, and probably shouldn't even get started.
3. I don't have much money, and may never have much money. The things I spend my time on, my preference for financial risk, and my propensity to say "this is too easy, I need to make it harder," are very likely to make this the case. You should not date me if this bugs you.
4. As a general summary of all the above, I have a cavalier attitude towards life and death. I'm fine being what I am each day, would be quite happy to be told I'm dying tomorrow, have no problems with growing old, can't actually wait to grow old and die on days when I'm bored, and for example, have never bothered with health insurance. Not to say that any of these are permanent traits, but they describe the past and present version of me.
Tough sell to these urban/e kitties, eh?"