2015-11-19

So Emo

Series A funded startup comes by our cafe. Sales person provides a list of criteria for participation in their service. Criteria include the public advertisement of hours during which cafe prices will be slashed, the specific hours, and the specific margins to be reduced. Staff respond with "we'll have to discuss this internally."

Now get this, it is gold. The sales person says:

"OK. Can I sit here for a while longer? I am feeling emo."
And my advice to staff was:

"Now go get a cup, put two tissues in it, and place it on the table in front of the guest. We must always be hospitable."

2015-11-17

INTP Management

(Insert Tim Gunn supercut.)

Summary:

- People, this is shit.
- You make the difference between the world, which is full of shit, and a better tomorrow.
- Make it work.
- I believe in you.
- Drop mic.
- Standby to pick up pieces.

Repeat ad nauseum.

2015-11-16

Much Ado About Bi-polar Personality Disorder

Some sweetheart just told me, that I am one of their 13 friends on Facebook. Only 13. Because only 13 are trusted. That's hilarious. I have 1338 friends on Facebook, and I don't trust a single one of them! I wake up daily expecting to be run over by a car, to have my bank account emptied, to be beaten to a pulp, or arrested by a third-world government. But none of that stops me from being friendly, and engaging with the world. So I speak, deal, shake hands, and sleep with various ones of you. It doesn't matter how little you relate to other people - if you choose to be in the world, you must engage with the world. We gotta get a'long... come on, people... get serious here.

Why would anyone believe anyone who says "you can trust me," LOL. It behooves an absence of intelligence and the lack of operational integrity that anyone should believe such statements. Which is generally why I don't make such statements... it'll save you time and money. Here's a theatrical statement: faith based economies must die; only science persists.

2015-11-15

Pray for Yourself

(Another reaction to #prayforparis.)

#jesuislefou

Pray for yourself.  Your feelings are hurt,  your mind cowering... in the bleak rage of stories that reach you from places afar - places that were always there, threats that were always there,  loss that was already accounted for... in books which you have failed to open. Your trembling is an abyss,  your ignorance now stripped naked and cold. Pray for yourself lah.