2016-08-02

Yawn 9

Shooting point-blank into both sides of a car at the same time? Where did these guys learn to kill people, Hollywood?

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Our internship description: "accounting & finance"

Our intern ended up doing: spreadsheet programming, pivot tables, implementation of binary search algorithm, relationship counselling

I think we're pushing our luck here...

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Putin + Trump + ASSANGE = GG
LOL?

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Here's a cybernetic paradigm. There are three categories of staff in any organisation. Some companies split this into management-track (1. the more managed, and 2. the less managed), and subject-matter-experts (3. the SMEs). I tend to think of them as:

1. babies
2. babysitters
3. ghosts

If you're not sure which category you fall into at your office, you're probably #1.
:)

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Awake. Are we dead yet? Not quite, but familiar problems have recurred. (You know, the updates are going to sound like this for ten years even if we don't die. You know, like, we had no choice so to survive we had to X, where X is the growth opportunity.)

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Averaging one grain serving every two days now... remarkably helpful. I effectively work a desk job now. LOL.

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Boot camp:

"This hurts, that hurts."
"Keep practicing."
"But you don't feel anything."
"That's because I practiced. Train up. We're all lucky we got paid to practice at some point in our lives. Not everyone is that lucky."

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Oh yes, an elaborate nightmare I had recently... it was a bit of a "reflection while sleeping" of how some charities which are initially motivated by specific strategic initiatives eventually become so popular that they turn into social clubs with less clarity of purpose. LOL

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I consistently find my desire to be ordinary, to be destructive to my relationship with people who seek to be extraordinary.

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It was always going to be, death by poisoned fish head. Everyone knows where my food is.

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"Perghhhhh... whole month bank fees, GST input tax was unclaimed."
"How many cheesecakes is that?"
"I'm glad you understand that the base of any number system is arbitrary."

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Dinner. Smatterings of work before the system goes down. If I do normal things, I can become a normal person. So on we go.

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The stench of humanity. Ah, our daily bread.

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Servers going down for five hours. So... enforced break time.

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Random thought crossed my mind - might be nice to go full PhD track in math already. Looks left. Looks right. Nope. Ain't happening in this town.

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Six-and-a-half years to forty. I need to catch up on that undergraduate math major. Looking through that archive of textbooks now.

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Back to the farm.

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I shy away from most things that are difficult. Really, I do. What's easy for me, however, isn't easy for everyone. Menial labour, filthy substances, I can go about these without much ado. Caring about other people enough to want to persuade them of this or that normative belief... I could not be arsed, for the most part. And that leads me to the strange economics of going through most of life as a matter of formality. Very early on, I'd completed for my own benefit all the things in life that matter deeply to me - what is relied on for the preservation of personal happiness: an orderly mind, an optimised cost of living, cheap hobbies such as studies in general, etc. So that being taken care of, all that's left to live life for is other people, really... social work, a philanthropic retirement, if you will.

If a woman enjoys my company, a relationship is a possible investment. If clients, employers, investors, or staff, find motivation to participate in a project, then a business is a possible investment. And when such counterparties have moved away of their own volitions, our fellowships will surely crumble as well. So, would I go significantly out of my way to pursue such social ventures? Hell, no. One does not sacrifice personal happiness for a lark's chance at building some arbitrary community. Economics will prevail.

Choices may be hard, but at least conservatism will always have low-risk approaches to fall back on. Are we dead yet - I regularly ask about the current job? Not quite - and every so often, these questions and their routine answers pop up and fade away. Like clouds at sunrise, threatening to deploy rainfall. Not always can we know where we will go.

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Pain. Just the usual sick stuff.

Nothing like a few days of fatigue, punctuated by the occasional hour or two of pain, to keep it real.

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Not yet time to pull the plug. Maybe soon.

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I suppose, the point of strategic alignment is this: given that I place a low value on many consumer goods and services, I should therefore place a low value on people who place a high value on such goods and services. Perhaps, that changes everything.

But this is not very different from previous considerations. More tuning required.

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