202x
Some stuff I redacted because of negative feedback. But as the counterparty has gone silent, I am restoring these for my own memory. It is difficult to manage things with people who don't practice straightforward negotiations. Not everything was saved, so not everything is recovered.
/date/
202x : met the new love of my life. But ..
"I love boys in onisuka"
WTF am I going to do with this bitch?
/date/
In 2011, my date decided she wouldn't hold my hand if I wore bermudas and oversized Ts. Consequently I adjust my wardrobe to accommodate the needs of the women I want to date. Do I care about the clothes per se? Not really - dressing conservatively is like eating conservatively, I do it as part of the job. In my own time, I am a $180 fish sauce dinner which is mainly for myself.
Analysis of 202x motivations, after a $350 date. It's work for me - I like studying things, and I need to know how markets work, and I work in F&B. She likes being taken out on dates, so I'll dress up and walk us around something fancy. Neither of us is there to savour the food. She'll want me to dress better, maybe even buy me clothes, (wouldn't be the first), and I'll engage with the performance ... until she tires of trying to find someone who cares underneath that facade.
Fashion is a tool, that's why fashions have slaves.
Accusations of neglect for the finer things in life ... are a distraction, because the fundamental difference is what we consider to be fine. Some of us are working hard to earn into finesse we don't possess ... some of us have comprehensive appreciations of our own finesse and are not trying to earn anything.
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Maybe it's just a difference in strategy. My point of view in 2005 was, Malaysian wages are low. RM 50,000 a month ... RM 200,000 a month ... none of this is really going to help in any materially useful way to get to $ 10,000,000, which is my rough estimate for a minimum acceptable retirement fund ... while allowing me to work on civilisationally relevant research at the same time. In order to make globally relevant money, I decided to skip the Malaysian corporate ladder because it's not globally relevant ... and the most globally relevant asset allocation, within easy reach while I just happen to have citizenship in Malaysia, is to do a lot of stupid jobs in operations because that's where the real gains are - in learning how to build things from scratch.
Bear in mind doing that there is a difference between stupid jobs that develop your mental faculties but pay less cash, and stupid jobs that cripple your mental faculties but pay more cash. Cash and mental faculties are not commensurate - one of these cannot obtain the other. The funny thing is time and time again I get people telling me, "if I had your talent, I wouldn't do the job you do", but I think I need to start telling them that I have my talents because of the jobs I do ...
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I probably have to circle back to that concept of having run out of ambitions before 2005. Since 2004, I think, my messaging has been consistently focused on being retired. That's because I had already figured out everything I had thought was a hard problem. All this other stuff mentioned above ... really is just passing the time until I die, whenever that is. In contrast, if I was still pursuing unfinished goals (I have to use my imagination to pretend that I am back in that space over 16 years ago), then I would probably now be focused on reading secondary sources instead of working on primary research.
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Uncertain date : circa early /date/
Roughly, as memory fails me ... "When seeking opinions, some women might prefer to indulge in platitudes, instead of listening to technical analyses of their cunt."
