2023-09-15 at

Wasted Neural Growth Factor

Up next - spending special allocations of time on interoception meditations to sort out all the extra data from anabolic inflammation.

If you think about the afferent somatic data, you  can figure out how to reduce the latency of afferent-efferent feedback loops. If you don't think about the afferent data, the nerves carrying those connections will atrophy, and fade away, so the entire capital expenditure of time spent abusing the flesh to generate neural growth factor / NGF to generate those nerves, will be written-off. Using nerves retains nerves.

How much capital expenditure on nerve growth have we written off, just like that?

Athletic Interference with Other Studies



Reflecting on this week's rate of learning, and the incidental capability to sleep at any time whatsoever.

I wonder if physiological stress from athletics increases immune stress levels, contributing to brain fog. If I process both verbal, and kinesthetic, studies in a spatial fashion ... is the competing resource demand the limiting factor on my speed of learning? Perhaps, if after a while, my brain becomes accustomed to certain athletic formats, then the demand for spatial reasoning and reflection will diminish there, freeing up those resources again for verbal studies.

Is that how this works? It has been my experience, throughout life.

2023-09-12 at

Meat is Complicated

Endocrinal effects on cognitive performance are a bit too complicated to handle right now. In the absence of lab facilities and extensive testing, I'll just have to wing it.


Sleep is mostly settled. Food is being settled. Strength and endurance training are just getting started. Constructive and destructive interference with sex then needs to be studied a bit. 


Meat is complicated.

Memory Management Notes

Memory management. In humans, consciousness is a memory buffer, containing data structures composed from sensory data, sometimes called qualia, or figuratively, the "atoms of human experience".

When we consciously study a thing, we step through a loop of forming conscious structures, then transferring those to the subconscious, longer-term memory storage locations, then emptying the conscious buffer, then attempting to recall from the subconscious the thing we wanted to learn. Often while performing this loop, we find that we can't empty the conscious buffer, at which point we need to pause the loop, to pay extra attention to clearing the conscious buffer. 

Since verbal and information is largely mediated by the auditory and visual sense modalities, an understanding of how to manipulate those modalities in the imagination is of particular interest. Commonly we find that displacing such modal images is possible ... therein people use music, and vistas, or other forms of ambient sensation ("ambiance") to keep the loop going. But in a fatigued state, that is not enough, so one has to specifically with fuller attention, vacate the said images from the conscious buffer. In doing so, we often find that the remaining imagery from the somatic sense modalities ... the interoception of heat, pressure, balance, vibration, pain, cold, etc. which are glomped together as "kinesthesia" ... becomes the main focus of one's conscious attention ("the loop"). This is where kinesthetic activities such as walking and other forms of exercise can be adopted to aid in the vacation of verbal information from conscious memory.

Actively monitoring the balance of each sense modality's data in conscious memory, and the rate of transfer for each modality, between conscious and subconscious memory, is the business ("art", or "skill") of maintaining one's mind in the short term. These are the basic skills of tactical phenomenology.

The "mid" term memory adjacent to one's conscious buffer is a space often used for nouminous rumination ... that is, mutation of structures, simulatory exercises, and preparation of thoughts for further processing. I want to briefly address two major sorts of cognitive activities which take up much of our computational time. Elsewhere I have noted, that "analysis" may be understood to be the reductive process of applying prioritised paradigms as filtering operators upon new data ... whereas "synthesis" may be understood to be the generative process of deprioritising known filtering operators, in order to test the efficacy of new mutations in the space of operators. (There are loads of ways to define "analysis vs. synthesis" so just bear with this arbitrary distinction for the purpose of this note.)

The business of synthesis is thus of higher risk, and involves a modification of one's own cognitive apparatus in-flight. The business of analysis is simply a matter of following orders and getting on with business as usual in a lower risk fashion.

Study is a risk-on activity. Politics is risk-off. Science is risk-on. Engineering is risk-off.

Anyway, those are just some notes from my meditations today. I developed most of this understanding during my years in college, and now it is good to reflect and refine them, as I pursue my newer studies this year.

Dick and Time

People want different things out of relationships. Some want to be talked, some want to be touched, and some want to be paid. (There are some other economies, of course.) Since I was a teenager I generally looked for people to talk to - generally, I don't find them, so I spend my time working on my own. Given enough years of work, I found time to indulge the members of society who like being touched and paid for - but these remain lower priorities for me. Given my low priorities in those departments ... it's no surprise I still don't fully understand how my dick works, at the age of forty, haha. Knowledge improves operations over time.

2023-09-11 at

Referers & Job Applications

I was having coffee with friends of friends. One person was applying for a job - they asked a colleague if they could provide testimony, WHILE falsifying their working relationship. Here's what I opined as a list of scenarios ordered by preference :

1. You get a positive or moderate reference, without falsification of facts.

2. You get a negative reference, without falsification of facts, but you were already able to tell the potential employer to expect it, because of XYZ reason.

3. You are unable to provide a referer.

4. You falsify a referer - because it gives the employer grounds to fire you if they find out.

Let me put it another way. The whole point of asking a candidate to suggest a referer,  is to TEST the behaviour of the candidate with regards to political capability. Of course, the employer knows that suggestions will be biased. If the employer wanted to get real information about the candidate, they would just have done some research and called down the related parties without asking the candidate for suggestions.

Geez please, it's not rocket science.

The Helical Path ( of Long-term Memorisation )

I think the main benefit of secondary school in a rote-oriented system was that I came to understand that I had a high degree of control over my memory over the minutes-to-weeks scale. I could basically stuff anything in and retain it ... this I consider to be short-term skilling, and one can forget a lot of this after the weeks pass - there's plenty of documentation on that.

However, I don't feel that I have a great degree of control over how to use only a short amount of time, to cement knowledge from this shorter term into my longer term memory ( years to decades ). I don't know if it's a matter of indiscipline ... as perhaps my current practice of simply swapping between subjects in a helical fashion over the months and years, is doing precisely what I should be doing.

I just don't know.

2023-09-10 at

Dietary Check

Normalising the rations a bit, for added stimulus.

List A: 
a1. brown rice
a2. tofu
a3. wheat
a4. rye
a5. oats
a6. instant coffee

List B:
b1. creatine
b2. beef protein isolate / whey isolate
b3. fish oil
b4. multivitamin
b5. methylcobalamin
b6. beta alanine
b7. leucine
b8. arginine / citrulline
b9. methionine
b10. probiotics
b11. citric acid
b12. baking soda
b13. NaCl
b14. KCl

List C:
c1. kimchi
c2. kailan
c3. oranges
c4. furikake
c5. chilli powder
c6. pepper ( various formats )
c7. diet sodas
c8. balsamic vinegar
c9. instant noodle packs
c10. emmental cheese
c11. black tea

... alright, I need to build this part out, a little. Probably need another ten or so unprocessed whole foods list C. Mainly for microbiome diversity.