Life in society

Life in society is a constant conundrum. On one hand we each have personal preferences, and on the other hand we are engaged in a social contract of uncertain definition. Say for example, if I review my basic tendencies, my preferences, and what I perform out of social obligation, there may be three different things altogether. (An unpopular fellow once called these the id, the ego, and the super-ego. But for discussion's sake, let's just talk in the same way.) Being a mammal of sorts, I may have sympathies for people; but my ethical stance requires that I aim to treat people indifferently in a completely amoral fashion, without regard for life or death, safety or danger, pain or joy; yet despite my amoral preferences, I remain attached to the society I live in, and I play a role as a friend, business partner, customer, teacher, student, mentor, mentee, citizen, antagonist, etc., and so I must adopt the values of such social roles to the best of my ability regardless of my tendencies to be more sympathetic than the norm, and my preference to be less. How about you, how do you do it?