2020-10-04 at

Yawn 66

 2020-09-21 - 2020-10-04

2020-09-21-08:34 end of day. Recharged my car's AC by myself for the first time. Cleaned the house drain also.

Avoiding more coding today in the interest of building more mental agility rather than focusing.

16:38 up and alert. B12, salt management, and exercise may have helped with sleep. Only eight hours were consumed, but also I was not entirely exhausted at the time of entry.

What is the technical or a shorter term for falling asleep?

Looks like another day of solo work. But I may allow myself dinner with a friend.

2020-09-22-02:35 midday. Break from work. Time for a walk and review time, perhaps.

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2020-09-22-16:45 Back at a desk after enforced feeding. Focusing on work. Keeping an eye out for the usual news.

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I think I finally got banned from a local developer group. The last thing I posted was a comment "Collect everyone's opinion; trust no one. 🙂"

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Malaysia is one of those places where innovation goes to die. How do we change that? Should we even bother?

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2020-09-23-19:24 rice meal near the office. Insides of mouth burnt from breakfast. Mouthwashed halfway through sleep ... can't be sure if the itchiness in throat was due to histamines versus burn, or bacteria eating up the dead skin.
We have so many opportunities for data in our world. If you value wellness, there is much to look forward too. But these are mediated by our oligarchs, so if you value wellness you must value wealth also.
I am not sure that I value either ...  but in the short term, wellness is necessary. How should we die?
I must write about a personal failure today. It is a repeating issue, and with each error I increase my dataset, so this will be the latest iteration for review.
Just done with the second meal, and walking home. The cina kopitiam on the corner is blasting Deep Purple at closing. 23:40

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2020-09-24
M&E repairs at the shop before dawn. Fixed a bug in software configuration preventing new user sign-up. Tyre replacement before rest.
Pre-bedtime. Incredibly tedious punishment chore of unliking hundreds of profiles of overseas people I thought I might have something to say to. This is not the time. A good reminder of priorities - best to work on the bodies at hand, than the minds at reach. As always, I will fix this, as I don't expect anyone else to do it for me. 🤷🏻 Need to recalibrate to search for locals again.
Going to eat, groom a little, maybe fall asleep, or continue work.
The nap was short. Work continued a few hours later.
Like-list cleared. Holy crap, what a chore.
2020-09-25-03:20
Followed this with some social gaming, and soon to proper sleep. Maintenance coaching in the morning.
What an insane 36 hours.

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Historical data indicates that it takes about five years for me to get over heart break. That doesn't mean I stop loving a subject, but perhaps that's when I start to deprioritise their memory. There are so many overlapping periods of such.
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It's been long established that I am a lousy friend when it comes to establishing smooth communication protocols with cagey people. My disinterest in empathy as the defining factor of friendships is a key factor in this. That being said, good friends are hard to find, and whenever I lose one I generally ask to have them back, even when they express disinterest. In commerce, it is simply said that you don't know the limits of what you have access to until you ask. With my latest lost of a friend, I intend to maintain projected discipline and only text them in the next new year. I don't expect to be take seriously, or to even be acknowledged. But I suppose, I must remain consistent in my approach to these social things. That is a portfolio strategy.

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I was just contrasting a recent experience with one I had a while ago, in 2007. I had met a girl, and we dated a few times ... but I was concerned that our relationship was defined mostly by sexual compatibility than by friendship. So, I proposed to her that we cease sexual interaction in order to first focus on exploring the construction of a friendship before resuming sexual relations. She was adament that if we stopped being sexual, she would simply not wish to date me at all. 
.
Perhaps this experience instilled in me an unhealthy aversion to negotiating the deescalation of sex, in order to focus on constructing friendships. Given this reflection, I should remind myself to focus more on building friendships with partners.

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- you start
- someone dies
- you lose a friend
- you take a shower
- you go back to work
- your co-workers leave
- you log a few milestones
- you get new co-workers
- your co-investors leave
- you learn a few things
- something breaks
- you learn a few more things
- something else breaks
- you learn to fix hardware
- you take a break to mend your health
- you build software
- you invest in people
- someone dies
- you lose a friend
- you write a song
- you go back to work
- other friends comfort you
- nothing is ever the same, because each detail is irreplaceable
- you take a shower
- you go back to work

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Sometimes I'm mainly driven to focus on work because I've been abandoned by this or that party. Who else will save my ass? 😛 Story of my life, perhaps.

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2020-09-26-15:35 up, missing a lower priority breakfast idea.
16:52 more awake now. Disappointments are just reminders to pay closer attention to work. Much to do.
17:20 quiet time (meditations on tactical business) shall commence.
18:12 washed. Need to get groceries for shop.
I think, I should update my dating profiles with new information. Done.
22:50 some tiling work done at the office. Multi-vitamins of late seem to be helping with metabolic rate (perhaps it's jist the B complex component).
Going to clean the house fridge.
Then lunch. And back to the office to keep the boys company till closing, while desk working.
Coded half a feature and coached some maintenance issues.
2020-09-27--12:42 did not fall asleep, for the better part of seven hours, but up for recycling delivery and a social.

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Cleaning my shared housing fridge: I swear, unkempt domestic fridges are their own special variety of sickness. You never know how long it's been since the owners cleaned them.
Do you think anyone would pay RM150/first-hour + RM75/hour to have their home appliances cleaned inside and outside to a spotless condition?
Because we are already doing this haha.

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Seriously tempted to just throw money at this problem. Like a week's wages / my monthly rent.
I don't need the money, but my business does. More than some girl, whatever amount of hurt she's in, so, once again, work wins.
But I really would send a bottle if it wasn't going to affect my work.
I should have led with that lol. #lovelanguageroulette

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Considering renovation of a roofed area beside my office. Examination of local law indicates that asbestos is hardly regulated in Malaysia. 
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2020-09-28-14:45
Day begins. The usual concerns have leaked into conscious memory, overnight, both sense data, and code as sense data. Housekeeping must now proceed to evaluate the conscious memory space, and to aggressively select what data to run through what code. Most of it just needs to be recompacted and restored ex-consciousness. The term "sub-conscious" may be considered inaccurate because it imputes hierarchy. Ex-conscious memory, and ex-conscious computation may be more accurate terms, without the connotation of temporal priorness.
Once that is done, I must prepare myself for the next few years of work, again. Preparation for the next lonely journey, albeit on the same project. While it is being done, I must wash and feed.
2020-09-29-0326
Standing stretch, legs apart at the all-night-lit park nearest to me. Earlier: Did some tiling. Installed a barrier at the bar. Miscellaneous desk things. Need to buy a glasscutter to learn how to work tiles.
Looking at Orion's belt, the hunter, etc. I don't remember most constellations. The sky is empty but for a few wispy clouds today. There is lightning in the distance. 
Managed to enjoy desk work at the cafe a bit. I guess I should go there to sample and tweak customer experience whenever I am not working on heady stuff that benefits from silence and large monitors.

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I was working out on a court near my room. Someone walked up to me.
"Hi," they said. I looked up.
"I ... sense a presence near me. But I don't see anyone," I said, "if there's anybody out there who wants to be seen, tell me that you're there. Who's there?"
#minishorts

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Decyphering alcohol licenses in Petaling Jaya:
- (city) MBPJ Perlesenan says:
- if you are registered under a "management office license", and if you sell only soft drinks to occupants not visitors, you do not need a rider license
- all co-working i.e. office sublet businesses are registered under "management office licenses", and once someone pays the coworking rental fee they are considered occupants not visitors
- so whatever you sell to occupants, even if it is weird, the coworking rental fee is effectively a cover charge antecedent to an otherwise unregulated sale of goods (the rental fee converts a visitor into an occupant, and MBPJ doesn't care what you sell to occupants)
However, on booze:
- once you go over X%, regulation falls under the district (bigger) not the city (smaller)
- (district) Pejabat Tanah Petaling says:
- whomever the F you are, you need a "retail RM840/y" license at minimum (whereas MBPJ appears to simply not enforce this on behalf of the district)
- caveat: Pejabat Tanah Petaling says to inquire again tomorrow with a senior staff
... on we go.

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Ok ... you know how I say eat/sleep/ travel are the unholy trifecta of femme online dating profiles? There's one more thing ... not sure if CmB makes it an MCQ option ... "makes me laugh" ... I swear there were like five profiles in a row with this, and it's probably a good thing that CmB is helping stressed women to express that feeling, so that men know how to make themselves useful. But wow, people are so boring. 😫
Wondering now about how this maps to predispositions in the balance between SNS and PSNS in different sexes.

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Gin: Why do so many people like Roku? I found it cute but boring. OK, IDKA, sorry.

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I don't have Snapchat. Should I download it just to make an anime avatar? No - I could probably just post a still of Avatar's protagonist ... or that one-punch fucker ...

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My useless best friend sent me a link and asked me to hit on Ms Thai USA.
I live in Malaysia, it's COVID season.
Thanks best friend, ILU.

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Today's DIY project: WHY IS THE CSV STANDARD SO LOOSELY DEFINED
Build a parser. Explicitly delineate rules.
(A day or so later:)
OMG. We wrote a CSV parser. WHY. Well, in all honesty, on the way to ETL ...  this is the L.

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2020-10-02-06:53 Perhaps my last week of bad sleep is just due to insufficient HVAC utilisation. Too hot. Maybe I lost track of basic infra while trying to shore up other basic infra.
Fix up. Fix car. Do payroll.
Coding. B12 and fish oil. Nap. This. That. More coding. Counselling staff.
2020-10-03-00:11 More food. 
I need to zero my imagination for more hours per day. Been lacking practice here.

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Not feeling very effective at work this month (probably just a sentiment, and not grounded in any metric). But in order to increase pressure on myself, I think I'll skip a paycheque. 😛
Lots to clear up outside of office, in order to get more official stuff done.
2020 finally got to me, because I neglected a part of my support structure that was outside of official responsibilities.
Focusing on the rebuild. But everything gets harder. 😕

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Paradoxically, Biden may be the one to die first as a result of Trump having C19.
All bets are off. #usa2020

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"You seem to treat relationships like an Olympic sport."
"What, no ... relationships are like work. I mean, sex is a sport ... relationships are business ... "

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Personal memory management update. Items I do need to check off daily.
- zeroing the imagination: doing it at least once a day helps remind me to do it tactically intraday, otherwise I forget that the tactic is available
- reviewing business priorities: doing it at least once a day helps to realign the days amidst each week
- reviewing the fears and triggering semantics of my loved ones: doing it at least once a day reminds me of how to handle them delicately
- reviewing dietary, grooming, and sleep daily: work, work, work ...

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"How come your profile all so deep thoughts?"
"Beats me, bitch ... just think about how much time I spend wondering what to do with the lot of you who think that way."

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CSV load vector is kinda sorta done.
2020-10-04-21:38 and so today is a bit of a rest day.

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Coffee Meets Bagel - the app that's supposed to focus on quality, has horrible mobile chat latency (UI and network), no desktop interface, geez.

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