Briefing for freshie bartenders

In the future you will expect to piss off a customer 3 times in ten minutes. The entire service cycle can start and end three times in ten minutes. Then get used to doing those ten minutes for 2 hours straight twice a day. Heheh. Plus 6 hours of less exciting duty. It should become pretty obvious, pretty quickly, if you aren't interested in learning how to do this.

In other news:

Partner: "Why don't we explicitly state that the cake is Instagrammable?"
Me: "Because you then sound like you care. And thereby become mediocre."

Well to tear down the economics / psychology of it... here, the marketer basically panders to the narcissism of the audience.

People take photos of things, in order to keep or share them, because either:
(a) the sight of the thing makes them happy (utilitarian complexities abstracted), or
(b) they believe that they will want to revisit the sight of the thing, or
(c) they believe that the shared sights will make others happy AND that the happiness of others thus derived will in turn make the photographer happier ("but I just want other people to be happy; yes, because it makes you happy")

So:
(a) telling people "this cake will make you happy" is obtuse (or Orwellian)
(b) reminding people that technology exists to help them achieve this goal is actually a legitimate argument for the deployment of "this is an instagrammable cake" signs (but seriously - it's 2015...)
(c) refer to (a)... what kind of moron wants to be told that they need to be told what their tastes are? OK - I concede... you can occasionally say "Instagram this," But you have to also provide an argument along the lines of "because it's only going to last for 10 seconds."

Roach, ass, char seow, burnt stick, cardboard, tissue paper, tar... know your coffee descriptors tongue emoticon don't be all pussyfooting around the defects.